Tag Archive | #ttc

ITS BEEN AWHILE…..

Well I think it is has been too long since I have written. ¬†Since my last entry there has no been no new news. Not pregnant, didn’t get pregnant, NOTHING. I had this bright idea to start writing a book about my infertile journey. Who will read that? It was semi therapeutic. I guess that is why I found myself back to my blog. I don’t want this journey any more to be negative and all down in the dumps. Even though we all know there are days when everything sucks. I swear I want to have as much fun with life as I can and live. I feel like I have gotten used to oh not pregnant so much I forget to live. My husband and I are both in school and my nursing program hasn’t even started yet but they told me pregnancy during the program will not work. So guess we will look back into children in 2019. Yup you read that right. 2019. My husband is so excited. At least in my mind I feel like he is celebrating. We haven’t had sex since February anyway. People always say well you’ve got to spice it up. It doesn’t matter what I do or what I say HE ISNT INTO SEX. Sex for pleasure or baby making I am on my own here. He wants a blood relationship so there goes the idea of adoption. My life has been a freaking mess. You haven’t missed much except a few agreements over when to have kids. I will be 34 and he will 44 in 2019. I know that is still “young” but seriously I wish you can feel my frustration. I know there will come a time when he says sorry I don’t want to have kids. I think he is there and won’t say anything. Those that know me having being a mother is NO SURPRISE. I asked him on the first date. YES! He was on board. It’s been 9 years of nothing. Fertility treatment after the next nothing works. IVF is the next step he won’t step out with me. I am completely at a loss for words. Anyway this is my rant for the evening getting you caught back up in my life. ¬†Until next time

Stella Nash

Round 3 of Clomid Hell

Well started round 3 yesterday. Geez I’m already over this. My husband got good and bad news today. Good news his sperm is moving good. Bad news quantity. He is starting Clomid as well. But then we had this conversation that turned into a complete disagreement. We are seeing a new fertility doctor Friday. He said now we can’t afford IVF. I said no one has that kind of money. I feel like he is giving up and now he doesn’t want this as much as me. I hope and pray that this gets better and he will get back on board. I hope he is just scared and unsure. I am scared as well but we need to be a team not fighting separate battles. Until next time,

Stella Nash

Clomid take 2

Well I have been a little quite lately. Round 2 of Clomid has begun. No side effects that I can tell. I am just keeping everything crossed. I’m hoping I get my BFP!! I have two more days of medicine and then the fun part begins! I am almost at the end of the rope. I know God doesn’t give us more than we can handle and I’m sure this is a faith builder. His timing will be perfect but I can’t help but to lose hope sometimes. I will keep everyone updated. Until next time,

Stella Nash

Day 2 Clomid

Well day 1 was yesterday of Clomid. Only hot flashes to report! I’m hoping since its a low dose I won’t have many side effects. I feel overall pretty good. I had a huge job interview today so just waiting to hear the news about that so I’m a little anxious. Now just riding out a thunderstorm and reading a book! Until next time,

Stella Nash

Clomid…

Well I’m starting Clomid in a week. I’m nervous. Ive heard and read so many horrible things!!! I just hope it works. I can’t wait to blog next week about side effects and what I’m feeling!! Should make for an interesting post!!! According to my blood work I’m not ovulating. So we are starting at the 25mg level and guess we will go up from there. Here’s to hoping the stork finally delivers our baby!!! Until next time,

Stella Nash

Blood Results are in…

Hey all well my Day 21 blood results came in. No shocker here I’m not ovulating!!! I’ve been trying to tell them this for 2 years!!!!!!! I switched Drs and guess what she listened to me!!!! I said I’m better sure I’m not ovulating my fertility doctor never checked. Omg!! I’m relieved and pissed off all at the same time!!! Anyway so now we wait for m Day 5 to get here so we can try Clomid. I never have tried Clomid only letrozole. I didn’t like it. I felt like it wasn’t doing anything for me. If anyone reading has done Clomid could  you shoot me a comment and tell me how it was. Your pros and cons!! Anyway cheers to the weekend and my shitty non-working ovaries. Until next time,

Stella Nash

Day 21

Hey everyone. Sorry for being quite the last couple days. I needed time to recoup and rest. I feel alright. I had day 21 blood work this morning to see of I ovulated. After that I’m hoping to start a round of Clomid! Hooray!! I want to get back in the swing of things. I do tale care of myself but I’m ready to hit this baby making thing with full force!! G is on board so just because I’m saying me and I please don’t think I’m doing this without him. We are trying and working to being in a better place.  I’m ready for the weekend for sure!! I’m ready to had to the pool and drink some cols beers while I can before my medicine!! Anyway hope everyone has a good day! Until next time,

Stella Nash